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Introverts are often naturally inclined to adapt themselves. You might say "yes" to a party because you think it's expected of you, even though you'd rather stay at home. Or you agree to take on an energy-draining project at work because you don't want to disappoint anyone. But ask yourself this: are you truly living, or just surviving?
Adaptation is something many introverts know all too well. It often stems from a deep-seated need to belong, avoid conflict, or not be seen as "too difficult." You might recognize the little voice in your head saying: "Just go along with it, and you won't stand out."
While this behavior can sometimes be helpful—like maintaining harmony—it also has a downside. Constantly adapting to the expectations of others can make you lose touch with yourself. You're no longer living according to your own needs but based on external demands. And it drains your energy. A lot of energy.
Living vs. Surviving
Living and surviving may seem similar at first glance, but in practice, they feel very different. When you're surviving, you do whatever it takes to get through the day. You automatically say "yes" to expectations, follow routines without reflection, and let yourself be guided by what others want. Surviving often feels like running a race without knowing where you're headed.
Living, on the other hand, means consciously choosing what matters to you. You make time for things that energize you, dare to say no to what doesn’t suit you, and follow a path that feels right for you. It’s about fulfillment, moments of joy, and connection.
Take a moment to think about your past week. Did you take time for yourself, or were you rushing from one appointment to the next? Did you dare to say “no,” or did you feel obligated to say “yes” to everything? Did you feel recharged, or were you drained?
Setting Boundaries
So, how do you stop surviving and start truly living? It all begins with learning your boundaries. We often don’t realize we’ve crossed them until it’s too late and we’re completely exhausted. Take time to reflect on what energizes you and what drains you. Once you have clarity, you can make more deliberate choices.
The next step is practicing saying “no.” This can feel daunting at first, but remember: saying “no” to something that doesn’t suit you is really saying “yes” to yourself. Start small: for instance, decline an extra task at work if your schedule is already full. You’ll find it gets easier over time.
Recharge Intentionally
Make a conscious effort to plan moments to recharge. For introverts, spending time alone is often crucial for regaining energy. Treat these moments as just as important as a meeting with a friend or colleague. Schedule them in your calendar and protect that time.
Choose What Fits You
Ask yourself repeatedly: Do I really want this, or am I doing it because I think I should? It’s tempting to always meet expectations, but it feels so much better to stay true to yourself.
Find Your People
Lastly, surround yourself with people who understand and accept you for who you are. Seek out like-minded individuals—people with whom you don’t feel the need to prove yourself. This makes it much easier to follow your own path.
Make the Shift
If you take these steps, you’ll find that living becomes more natural and surviving less automatic. It’s a process, but one that’s absolutely worth it.
Does this resonate with you? Would you like support in making the shift from surviving to truly living? Schedule a free introductory session. Together, we’ll explore what you need to start living authentically again.
