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At school, you had to raise your hand and speak up. In meetings, the person who talks the most often seems to know the most. And at parties, “fun” is often measured by volume. It can feel like you have to change in order to fit in — become more extroverted, more visible, quicker to respond. But what if that’s simply not your way?
Introversion is a personality trait deeply rooted in the brain. Introverts are more sensitive to external stimuli, partly due to increased activity in the insula and the prefrontal cortex (Depue & Collins, 1999). As a result, they tend to think before they speak, need downtime to recharge, and prefer depth over superficiality.
These preferences are neurologically and biologically determined and don’t fundamentally change just by “practicing” extroverted skills more often. What is possible, however, is that introverts learn to make the most of their qualities in a world that doesn’t always recognize their value.
The extroverted ideal
Western culture — especially in the United States and much of Europe — strongly values extroversion. People who are assertive, energetic, and outgoing are more likely to be seen as competent, leaders, or even more intelligent (Judge et al., 2002). This creates social pressure to play an extroverted game, even when it doesn’t suit you.
In organizations, this is reflected in preferences for brainstorming sessions, networking events, and agile stand-ups where quick reactions seem to matter more than thoughtful contributions. For introverts — who, according to Jung (1921), draw energy primarily from their inner world — this can be draining and frustrating.
Yet, as an introvert, you don’t need to adapt to extroverted norms to be successful. Scientific research shows that self-awareness and embracing your own style are linked to greater psychological well-being (Ryan & Deci, 2001). That means knowing what works for you and making intentional choices based on that.
Creating space
If you know you prefer to think before you speak, take time to prepare for meetings and allow yourself moments to reflect. If you notice your energy drops after a busy day of interaction, deliberately schedule recovery time. And if you function better in small groups than at large social events, seek out meaningful one-on-one conversations.
It also helps to surround yourself with people who appreciate your pace, observational skills, and thoughtfulness. From relationships where you can truly be yourself, you’ll draw the most energy and connection as an introvert (Laney, 2002).
Introversion isn’t a flaw to fix, but a strength to nourish. In an extroverted world, there’s a growing need for people who listen, reflect, and are fully present. The key is not to try to be someone else, but to grow more fully into who you already are.
Would you like to explore how to thrive as an introvert at work and in life? I’d love to talk with you about it.